This is the costume I wore to work on Halloween....

From the side:

And from the back (note the working propeller):

It took me about 6 hours over two days to construct the boat and decorate it with help from both my mom and dad.  The reason I had to wear this costume is that as part of the Finance Group at my work, we went with a theme costume.  I agreed to be volunteered to construct and wear the boat costume.  Here is the group shot of our Theme Costume....

if you haven't figured out our theme yet, here is a shot of us from the back, which might help...

If you still haven’t figured out our group theme....We're a full house....2 Kings (Elvis, King of Rock 'n' Roll & the Burger King) and 3 Queens (Cleopatra, Queen of the Nile; Queen Elizabeth the First and me, the Queen Mary).

I thought our costumes were ridiculously good and that we would win the group costume contest for sure.  Unfortunately, we lost to the Operations Group, who dressed up as characters from the video game "Street Fighter."

From left to right: Chun-Li, Balrog, Dhalsim, Sagat, Edmond Honda, Blanka, Ryu, & Guile 



It was the guy who portrayed Blanka by painting his whole body green that got them the win, the judges loved his dedication and sacrifice for his art.

It kind of sucks that we lost -- I spent so much time on making my ship and there were these great little details on it, like a propeller that actually worked, the anchors were held in place with real chain, the smoke in the smokestacks, and not to mention that the colors were right as well -- I mean, I made a pretty accurate representation of the real boat for god's sakes!

 
See here:

 
I mean really -- not to brag too much -- but just compare the boat I made to these pictures and you'll see what I great job I did with my costume.  Oh, well, what’re ya gonna do?  The green dude killed our chances of winning.

So awesome.  47% of the 10 million (!) voters wanted to send Barry Bonds’ “record-breaking” home run ball to Cooperstown with an asterisk stamped on it to acknowledge the fact that Barry Bonds more than likely didn’t come by his place in the annals of history honestly (in other words, he’s a filthy cheater.)

I’m glad to see that people want to make a statement that there are consequences for not playing fair.  And I think the ignominy of having arguably your life’s greatest achievement rest under a cloud of suspicion for all time is a worthy punishment.

Perhaps common sense is making a comeback?

Nah.

So, after 12 days, 6 calls and 3 different Trouble Tickets, I finally have the DSL Service that I’ve been paying for since September 29, 2006.

I ran a new speed test with the speakeasy site, and I’m getting 2.5M (or 2544 kbps) download and 431 kbps upload speed.  That’s a damn site better than the average of 300 kbps speed I was getting before -- more than 8 times better.

Why it had to be like pulling teeth to fix this problem I have no friggin’ idea, but I can finally watch clips from YouTube without waiting for them to download and I can now watch streaming video and listen to streaming audio without buffering delays and connectivity problems.

Thank goodness.

Now I just need to complain to the Yahoo billing dept. and get them to refund a little something back to me for charging me for over a year without providing the promised service….Like THAT won’t be a total pain in the ass to resolve.  But I am nothing if not persistent.

My home computer crapped out on Sept. 2 and I had no internet access at home from Sept. 2 through Sept. 12, the horror!

I had a guy from the GeekSquad out to the house on Sept. 12, and he worked on my computer from 9:30 am till noon and couldn’t find anything wrong with it, nor could he duplicate the problem, which was that the computer wouldn’t boot up and couldn’t find the hard disk.  By booting up my laptop in “safe mode” (something I was loath to try on my own) he was able to resolve the problem, but nothing’s been fixed and I could easily go through the same issues again.

Argh.

The GeekSqud guy said that my memory was running really slow which probably contributed to the problems I was having, and that my motherboard was probably dying and I should think about investing in a new computer.  It’s not like my laptop is THAT old.  I hate the fact that nowadays really expensive that should last a while seem to be built to be disposable.  It’s ridiculous.

I don’t want to have to spend a lot of dough on a new laptop and I don’t want to have to learn a new operating system, as apparently, all new computers are now loaded with Windows Vista instead of Windows XP.  I was just starting to get used to using XP after having been on Windows 98 for a long time on my home computer.  Why must everything be constantly upgraded and changed?  It makes me crazy.

Another thing the GeekSquad guy said was that apparently I’m not getting all the high speed DSL I’m paying for.  He ran a speed test on my computer (here’s the site: http://www.speakeasy.net/speedtest/) and my download speed varies from as low as 40 kbps to as high as 350 kbps and my upload speed is around 350 kbps.

Oh my god...

I had to take a break from work and do something, anything else.  Hence, writing this journal entry so that I can catch a breather.  I’ve been assembling together three (well one so far) literature racks for displaying the Marketing Literature at work. 

They look like this: 36-Compartment Value Sorter Organizer, Gray, and they are exhausting to put together.  Lining up all the little holes to screw the separate pieces together?  Argh.  The holes don’t line up. And if you can, by some miracle, get them to line up, then the screws don’t want to go in straight.  And then, if you can get the screws to go in straight, then you can’t get good leverage to screw in the screws, so the screwdriver slips, and then you take gouges out of your hands and bleed all over the Lit Rack.  And then you have to practically play twister to get all the parts aligned and able to assemble it.  I swear, I broke out into a sweat putting together the first one and my back is aching.

The description for this product from Staples.com says, “Fast and easy quick-lock assembly.”

Fast and easy my ASS.  Looks like someone at Staples has been smoking crack again.

This is not for the faint of heart.

Back to work.  ::whimper, whimper::

I think this is hilarious.

Visit this website to help decide what should be done with the baseball that Barry Bonds hit to break Hank Aaron’s all-time homerun record.

I know how I’m voting.   ;o)

Last night I went to the Sharks Teal & White game, an intra-squad scrimmage between the players and prospects trying to fight their way on to the team.  Usually, this game is reserved for season ticket holders and group event organizers only, so I wouldn’t normally be allowed to go.  Luckily for me, apparently my work arranged a group outing to a Sharks game last season which put us on the list of people invited to the game, and further luckily for me, the gal who organized the event last year wasn’t interested in attending.  She offered up the invite to my boss, who in turn offered it up to me, knowing that I am one of the people in the office who not only would be interested in going, but would actually be desperate to go.

So, all in all this s another example of me being a lucky duck in my new job.

The game itself was highly entertaining; the new jumbotron and Message Ring at the Tank are totally awesome.  I was one of the biggest pooh-poohers on the block about the need to install a mega-jumbotron; it kind of struck me as an example of Nero fiddling while Rome burned.  Sure, a new jumbotron would be nice, but there were so many other important things for the Sharks to spend their money on, like the crappy ice conditions and free agents (especially a good d-man now that Hannan has bailed for greener pastures).

But after having seen the jumbotron in action, I have to admit, it was pretty dang nice. Like, ridiculously so.

And the Message Ring thing didn't bother me so much because it mostly remained static showing ads and looked pretty much like it used to when the ads were made of plastic with lights behind them.

The only thing that bothered me was when they were showing a graphic on the Message Ring with the words "Teal & White Game" with a shark fin racing around the top and bottom ring of the jumbotron and the style of the graphic was "jittery." It just made my eyes go all jittery in my head and made me feel nauseous if I looked at it too long. I swear, if they constantly show these jittery, shaky, caffeinated graphics on the jumbotron and the Ring 'o Death, someone at the Tank is going to have an epileptic seizure. I just hate that kind of stuff.  It makes me seasick.

But the HD replays on the jumbotron were really suberb, I must admit.  All I have to say is “WOW.”  It’s gorgeous.

(photo courtesy of chumnomore from The Feeder)
 

Before the Teal & White game began we were treated to a kids’ game played by 8-10 year olds.  They were pretty good, but there were many train wrecks and kids tripping over each other and taking each other out and whiffs and failed breakaways.  It was really cute.  How awesome would it be to be 10 years old and get to play a hockey game on real NHL ice?  That must have been pretty special for those kids.

After the kids played, they brought the Sharks onto the ice for introductions and began the Teal & White game.  It was so nice to see the boys out on the ice, skating their hearts out.  I am so ready for hockey season to start.

One thing I must say, I really do not like the new uniforms the team is sporting this season.

I can live with the new unis, but even after seeing them in action last night I still don't like them one little bit.  Screw Reebok and their RBK line, they completely suck trying to make NHL uniforms look like NFL uniforms.

This is really petty, but I really don't like the bottom hem of the jerseys. They're curved at the bottom like a crescent whereas before they were straight cut across the bottom.  It just looks stupid, like a dress shirt that you forgot to tuck in.  I don't like the tight fit, I don't like the stripes, I don't like the orange, I don't like the numbers on the front of the sweater, I don't like the new logo…

I don't like the new secondary logo….

(yeah, tell us how you really feel).

The best I can say about them is that they could have been worse. But that's not much of a ringing endorsement, is it?  I hate being a negative nellie, but I just don't like these unis much at all.

I just flat out resent the new unis that are being fobbed off on loyal fans by the NHL & Reebok. All that "uniform system" and "8% more aerodynamic" talk is just so much crap. It pisses me off. It's a flat out money grab by the league. If they were honest and up front about that, I might not be so angered. But I really resent being marketed to as if I were an idiotic child.

The NHL is famous for constantly fixing that which isn't broken. And in so doing, they cheapen their product by trying to turn it into something it isn't and by ignoring traditions. Hockey is what it is -- let it be what it is instead of trying to redefine it in terms of other, more popular sports.

Anyways, that's basically in a nutshell why I hate in the new unis. They represent all that is bad with the league tampering with what is good about the game.

But, just because I hate the new uniforms with the fire of a thousand suns it doesn’t mean that I’m not looking forward to the start of the season with baited breath.

First preseason game is tonight at Los Angeles, radio only game.  And the first home preseason game of the year is Friday night, for which I have tickets.  Yay!  Hockey’s back!

In my last journal entry all I had committed my money to was one little Philadelphia Flyers ticket.  Now I've gone and bought me a Rangers ticket, made hotel reservations in New York and New Jersey and cashed in 25,000 Frequent Flyer miles to fly from SFO to JFK and then from Philadelphia back to SFO.

I guess this crazy little road trip idea has become a solid reality.  Now all I need to get is the Islanders ticket and the Devils ticket and I’m all set.  I spoke to a representative from the Devils team and their individual game tickets don’t go on sale until October 15, so I’ll have to wait till then to get my ticket, but I don’t think it will be a problem to get a single ticket to a random mid-week game in February.  Unfortunately, I don’t know when the Isles/Sharks tickets go on sale (and neither do the fine folks at TicketMaster).  TicketMaster is currently selling Isles home game tickets right now, but only for the first half of the season. Nothing after the first week of January is on sale yet.  So, I’ll have to keep checking their site daily to see when I can get me a ticket for the Isles game.

I can't believe I'm going through with this, but it looks like I am.

Actually, I'm getting kind of excited the more I think about it.  This should be AWESOME.

I just hope it isn’t too cold for a weather-weenie like me who grew up in balmy California.  I might have to buy some winter boots.  Most of my shoes are sandals.

So this morning I did a very hair-brained thing. I spent a bunch of money on a foolish whim that now I have no choice but to go through with and see to the end lest my money be wasted on a non-refundable purchase.

So what the heck am I talking about?

ROADTRIP! 

It seems that my beloved Sharks are going to be making a trip back east this season to play against the Atlantic Division (New York Rangers, New York Islanders, New Jersey Devils, Philadelphia Flyers and Pittsburgh Penguins). As soon as the Sharks season schedule came out mid-summer, I noticed that all 5 of these back east games will be played on one road trip for the Sharks instead of in multiple trips back east, and that the first 4 games of the road trip will be played in 5 nights, from February 17-21, 2008.

With that kind of a compact schedule and 3 of the teams playing in the NYC Metro Area that is accessible by public transportation, it seemed like an intriguing idea to possibly follow the Sharks around Metro New York for a few days.

Add in the fact that my favorite aunt lives in Philadelphia and can offer me room and board to see the Flyers play and the road trip gets to be even more feasible. Then you add in the fact that Monday February 18 is President’s Day (work holiday) and I’ve got loads of frequent flyer miles waiting to be used and it seems almost silly NOT to go on this madcap trip.

Here’s my planned itinerary so far: 

Sat 2/16 Fly SJ-NYC, Check in to hotel:

Sun 2/17 Walk to New York Ranger game at Madison Square Garden 1:00 p.m. local time (MSG is 3 blocks away from hotel). Attend game from 1-4 pm, try to gets tickets for Broadway show at 7:00 pm: Spamalot, Lion King, etc.

Mon 2/18 Walk 3 blocks from hotel to Penn Station, take train out to Nassau Coliseum for game @ N.Y. Islanders 2:00 p.m. Think up a famous place to have dinner.

Tues 2/19 Sightsee in NYC

Wed 2/20 Take train from Penn Station New York to Penn Station Newark. Take Taxi from Penn Station Newark to Hotel and check in at 3:00 pm. Take another taxi to New Jersey Devils new arena. Attend Devils game 7:30 pm 7 take taxi back to hotel.

Thu 2/21 Take train from Penn Station Newark to 30th Street Station in Philly; transfer to SEPTA Market-Frankford Line to 69th St. terminal, then to Route 100 rail get off at Ardmore Jct, or Ardmore or Haverford (ask Aunt Chrissy which is the right stop. Drop off bags at Aunt Chrissy’s house. Get back on SEPTA take Route 100 rail to 69th street then transfer to Market-Frankford Line get off at 15th Street and transfer to Broad Street (Orange Line) southbound & get off at last stop, Pattison Ave. Go to Flyers game 7:00 pm, take train in reverse back to the house.

Fri 2/22 Sightsee in Philly, hang with Aunt Chrissy & cousins.

Sat 2/23 Sightsee in Philly, hang with Aunt Chrissy & cousins

Sun 2/24 Fly home from Philly to SJ – if its NOT possible to fly in to NYC and out of Philadelphia per AA frequent flyer rules, then I can either take the train from Philly to Newark and fly out of Newark (which is considered a NYC airport) or ask Aunt Chrissy or one of the boys drive me up to Newark to catch my flight Sunday morning.

So for a while I’ve been sort of mulling this over as an idea I might possibly pursue, but then today I made it a reality. I was given information about an internet presale on Flyer tickets. This morning at 10:00 a.m. eastern time, 7:00 a.m. pacific time, I went online to the Wachovia Center website and bought a single ticket to see the Flyers versus the San Jose Sharks on February 21, 2008. Seeing as how sporting event tickets are non-refundable, I guess I’m now locked into this trip, unless I want to chuck the approx. $100 I spent on a ticket in section 103….

What am I thinking?

Tomorrow at 10:00 a.m. eastern time, 7:00 a.m. pacific time, tickets go on sale for the Rangers, Islanders and Devils. Guess who’s setting her alarm clock to get up early tomorrow? Then I need to call the airline to book my flights and book the hotels I’ve already chosen and I’ll be pretty much done.

This feels pretty reckless to travel across the country alone to follow a hockey team, but then again, I get 4 weeks vacation every year, life is short, I love hockey, so why the hell not? 

God, I suck at this.

Lord knows I'm a big blabbermouth with too many things to say, but I never bother to put it here.  What's the fricking point of having a LJ if I don't use it?  OK, so here are some things I should have posted weeks ago.....

Since this seems to be the Summer Of Potter (at least it is for me)…..here is my belated review of the HP movie “Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix,” otherwise known as OotP.  I originally posted this movie review over at the Sugar Quill, which is my favorite HP message board and fan-fic repository, EVAR.

Originally posted on the Quill Jul 16 2007,  23:18

Is it rather pathetic of me that the movie has been in theatres for 6 days and I’ve seen it 3 times already? [Note: as of today's LJ entry, I've actually seen it 4 times, and I think I may see it again this weekend].

Now, generally, in the past I have not been the greatest supporter of the movies, (see negative review of PoA here and negative review of GoF here). The reason for this is simply because I adore/treasure/venerate the books so much that I never seem to cease to be disappointed when the movies inevitably fall short of my high hopes for them.

That being said, I can honestly say that I was very very pleased by result of OotP, the movie. Honestly, I think OotP currently ranks as my second favorite HP movie, right behind SS/PS, which I know many people do not care for due to its glacial pace, but which I have always loved because of its closeness to canon.

Interestingly, even though OotP is a longer book than GoF and a shorter movie, I still think OotP is a better adaptation. The main reason for this is that I feel like the screenwriter and director finally got the characterization right.

Reasons j'adore the film:

1)      Umb!tch was perfect. Horrible, cruel, nasty, wretched and utterly perfect. She absolutely made this movie for me. And the kittens! Everywhere the kittens! On her plates, on her sweater, on her broach, on her ring. And mewling! And all that pink! And she had a picture of Fudge on her desk. Some of the extra decrees they made up for the movie were great, especially the one about boys and girls having to maintain 8 inches of space between them at all times. She is just so completely evil with that girlish giggle while she tortures people. Loved everything about her. Imelda Staunton was brilliant in this role.

2)      Luna was wonderful. Just the right note of dottiness to go with her real insight into complex issues, “You-know-who wants you to feel alone because that makes you less of a threat.” Her homemade radish earrings were perfect and I loved the way she was so nonchalant while riding a Thestral.

3)      L-O-V-E-D that they kept Tonx’s pig snout transformation with Ginny giggling in the kitchen scene, and the fact that Tonx tripped over the Troll Leg umbrella stand in the hall. Would have liked more Tonx, but since we got so little of her, I’m glad they kept in those moments.

4)      The goat! Bwah!

5)      The Mimbulus Mimbletonia!

6)      Dan was terrific as Harry, just the right amount of CAPSLOCK and angst-y-ness versus sweetness and confusion and showing real strength and pride when teaching the DA.

7)      Ron came back! Oh, the joy! Sticking up for Harry to Seamus, sticking by Harry when Harry is nasty to him, being a good and loyal friend, casting his Jack Russell patronus, reminding Harry that he can’t do it all alone. Canon!Ron has returned for the first time since the first movie and it’s about time.

8)      Hermione got toned down, yay! Although I could have done without her taming Grawp with a “firm hand” -- that was too close to shades of Super!Hermione from PoA. Thankfully it was just a small part of the movie.

9)      Dumbledore’s escape with Fawkes was awesome. Bummer they gave Phineus Nigellus’ line to Kingsley, but still, it was a great looking scene.

10)  I loved the scene in which Padma and Pavarti make a paper bird and fly it around the DADA classroom. It was so illustrative of boy/girl teen interactions. The girls think its pretty and admire it and ooh and aah at it and the boys try to destroy it, Seamus by grabbing at it and either Crabbe or Goyle try to shoot it down with a slingshot. That felt like such an honest kind of moment, the girls act girly and the boys act rowdy. And then Umbridge regains order by burning it to a crisp. Hysterical.

11)  The music was great, especially the flight over the Thames (even though that was mighty OOC for Moody) and the Twins’ Great Escape.

12)  “I’m sorry professor, I must not tell lies.” Take THAT, Umbridge!

Things I’m bummed they left out but knew they had to sacrifice on the altar of running time:

1)      Aunt Petunia knowing what Dementors are and getting a Howler.

2)      Weasley is our King and Prefects badges.

3)      The Brain Room, Time Room and Planet Room.

4)      The kids getting separated and injured at the DoM and poor Neville getting tortured by Bellatrix and showing his true Gryffindor courage by screaming “I DOE YOU HAB!” through his broken nose.

5)      Harry going totally ALLCAPS and smashing Dumbledore’s Office.

And the scene I’m most bummed about missing…

6)      Christmas on the Closed Ward. My favorite chapter in the book. While Neville was awesome in the movie, I really would have preferred seeing him pocket that Drooble’s Best Blowing Gum Wrapper from his mum. That scene makes me weepy every time I read it and I’m just sad that they couldn’t fit it in. The scene he shares with Harry in the RoR is good, but nowhere near as good as St. Mungo’s could have been.

Minor quibbles/questions/nitpicks:

1)      The Dursley’s weren’t angry/frightened/shocked enough. Where was the Vernon who screams “ENOUGH EFFING OWLS!” at the top of his lungs and chucks Harry out of the house? And I think Dudley was way too comical and broadly played after his dementor attack.

2)      Why wasn’t Lupin part of the Advance Guard? It’s not like they cut the character from the movie.

3)      Why did they move The Black Family Tapestry scene to Christmas break?

4)      Why do they make Cho a 5th year? Did she flunk a grade like Flint?

5)      Why does Hermione introduce Luna on the carriage? Why couldn’t Ginny have introduced her? Ginny and Luna are both 4th years, Hermione wouldn’t know her.

6)      Why it implied that only Harry/Luna can see the Thestrals pulling the carriages? Neville’s standing right there and he can see them, too.

7)      Couldn’t they have given Percy one tiny line?

8)      Nigel? Ick. Why invent a little kid called Nigel when they could have used Colin or Denis Creevey to the same effect? Colin was established as a movie character in movie 2, why not bring him back?

9)      SWM was too glossed over, not a powerful enough scene.

10)  Bellatrix used AK on Sirius? What’s up with that? And how come it didn’t kill him immediately, but allowed him to share a moment’s meaningful eye contact with Harry before falling through the veil?

11)  The Voldy/DD battle looked too much visually like Priori Incantatem in GoF. Hey WB! Those two DON’T share wand-cores!

12)  I finally get my CGI green-eyed Harry I’ve been requesting for years, and it only happens when Harry is possessed!

And finally….a really petty nitpick when considering what we did get, but…

13)  I wanted a slightly stronger Ginny than the one we got. Yes, she got good screen time and an asskicking reductor curse. But, the filmmakers seem to want to keep Ginny on the path of still pining for Harry with her longing looks every time there was Harry/Cho interaction. In book 5 we are supposed to get the Ginny that was brought, the one who gave up on the lost cause of Harry and got herself a boyfriend (even though she never really gave up) so that she could finally be comfortable enough around Harry to talk to him. Why couldn’t the film makers have implied that Ginny had a boyfriend? Obviously we are supposed to infer that both Zacharias Smith and Michael Corner join the DA in the movie, Zacharias is the kid in the Hog’s Head who questions the truth of Harry’s story and Michael is the kid with the long dark hair sitting next to Ginny who asks Harry for details on the night Cedric dies. But I wish it had been made more implicit. All we have to do to establish that this is who they are for a fact is to give Ginny two quick lines in that scene:

Kid #1: Why should we believe you?

Ginny: I believe him, Zacharias.

Kid #2: If you gave us more details…

Ginny: Michael, honestly!

And that would be all it took. That and a few less pining angsty looks from Ginny. And maybe the line from Hermione that Ginny’s got a BF. I’d have been a little happier with Ginny. But overall I did think she was terrific.

Overall, I give it a 4 out of 5. I really really liked this adaptation and will probably see it for a fourth time after reading book 7.

I will try to get more entries up ASAP, I swear.

It’s also been a long time since I posted anything in this journal.  Maybe now is a good time to start again.  I doubt anyone will ever read this -- hubris to think anyone would -- but here goes.

As a first post to open my reconvened LJ, this is a story that I have meant to post for a long time running.  I originally wrote it out to be posted on a friend’s webpage back in the late 90s.  That website has long since been abandoned and I am no longer in touch with that friend.  But it is such a great story that it should always have a home on the web.  So here goes my post.

The Owen Nolan Chicken Rancher Story

My name is Rachel.  I am a Sharks fan.  The story you are about to read is entirely true (to the extent that I can remember the events!)  The beginning of my story is a topic that I bring up, not to elicit sympathy, but to explain the background of this goofy-ass story.

My older brother Chris died on February 22, 1996.  He was 29.

Exactly one month later, on Saturday March 23, 1996 the San Jose Sharks held a fundraiser for their main charity, the “Sharks Foundation”.  The idea behind the fundraiser was to “auction off” dinner with members of the Sharks team (you pay a couple hundred bucks and Owen Nolan comes to your house to eat meatloaf with you and your friends).  Obviously, this idea would be limited to a select few families in San Jose, as hockey rosters are relatively small compared to the population of a city such as San Jose.  Therefore, in order to broaden the event to the rest of the community, “dinner” was scheduled for different private homes, and after dinner all the players would then all congregate for “dessert and coffee”, which was held in the banquet facilities of a restaurant in San Jose called Lou’s Village, admission $50.00.  Also included at the public Lou’s event were a silent auction, player photos and autographs, etc.  (For more info on this event, take a look at the big coffee-table book entitled, “A Day in the Life of the NHL” if you have a copy handy – the event is profiled in there).
 

So I’m the hugest Sharks fan around, and I decide that I wanna get up close and personal with my guys, but do not have a couple thousand or so bucks burning a hole in my pocket to get Owen Nolan or Jeff Friesen over for a private candle-lit dinner at Chez Rachel.  (Dang!)  Therefore, I opt for just showing up at the dessert portion of the fund-raiser.  $50.00 is a lot more reasonable, and ALL the players will be there anyways.

My best friend Heather agrees to go with me, because even though she’s not that big a hockey fan, we’re like the two musketeers.  It’s the first time I’ve been out anywhere since my brother has died; I’ve been holed up in my apartment feeling lousy and sad.  Heather has to convince me it will be fun and I’ll enjoy it.

So we go to the restaurant and we’re there kinda early.  No players have shown up yet, the banquet room is pretty empty.  There are Bartenders set up at each corner of the room with coffee and complementary Champagne, so I get a glass.  It tasted good, so I got another.  Hey!  It WAS complimentary, after all.  Four or five glasses later and I’m starting to feel pretty good – and now the players are showing up.  Cool!  The people-watching is awesome.  They set up the silent auction, but the prices are outrageously expensive for me, one thing I can afford is player photographs.  Stand in line and for $10 you gat a photo taken with a Sharks player as a memento.  Awesome!  I am so there.  So we wait in line, I have a few more glasses of Champagne (they were little glasses – but by this point I’m probably most of the way through a whole bottle all by myself in under an hour).

As we’re waiting in line for the photographs, I realize that they’ve got three Sharks who are currently doing the photo session, Jeff Odgers, Jayson Moore, and Arturs Irbe.  None of these guys is a huge star or anything, but it suddenly became vastly important to me in my life that I have my photo taken with these three particular guys.  Follow me now; there is a connection here, sort of.  My brother had been living in San Francisco, and had been to one Sharks game in his life, back when the team played at the Cow Palace in Daly City in 1992-1993 before the San Jose Arena was built.  Odgers, Moore and Irbe were the ONLY three players left on the team who had also played for the Sharks in the Cow Palace days.  And coincidentally, these three players were all posing for photos together.  Surely this was a sign from God.

So Heather and I waited in line for over a half an hour, because it has now become my mission in life to have my photo taken with these three guys.  As soon as Heather and I are first in line – I mean literally we were standing right there in the front of everybody, one of the organizers says “Sorry!  Its time to start the auction, we’re going to stop photos for ten minutes or so, come back to your place in line and we’ll resume with different players”.  It’s more than I can bear.  In my inebriated and grieving state it’s like God has conspired against me to break my heart and deny me my one wish to have my photo taken with these three players.  (This was REALLY important to me for some reason).

So I burst into tears.

Talk about making a scene!  The organizers of the event are besides themselves, they don’t know what to do with me, Heather’s tying to calm me down and I’m just standing in the middle of the banquet room with big fat tears streaming down my face, glasses splattered, shoulders heaving, muffled sobs escaping – I’m a mess and a half.  Jeff Odgers, God bless him, asks no questions, and says, “I think we’ve got time to take one more photo”.  So Heather grabs some powder from her purse and attempts to make me presentable and I give a crooked smile and I get my photo with the three guys.  Of course I was completely mortified, but who cares, I got my photo and I was able to get the picture holder autographed by Odgers and Moore as well.  ;-) 

In the picture are from L-R: Heather, Artus Irbe, Jayson Moore, me, Jeff Odgers.

So then Heather drags me off to the ladies room to really fix my face, (I’m just a wreck at this point), and we wander off outside for a calming smoke to settle the jitters and we decide to get the hell out of there, because quite frankly I’ve caused a scene, and I’m feeling just a bit like a big ol’ asshole.  I keep apologizing, but she keeps telling me to forget it, who cares, after all I’ve been through, etc. – what a friend!

So as we’re going to get our coats from the coatroom, I see Jeff Odgers in the hallway and I tell him my story, how I’ve just lived through the shittiest 14 months, how one of the few things that kept me sane was the Sharks, so he won’t think I’m totally nutso.  I don’t know if I convinced him or not, but he was very polite to me.

Heather decides I should not go home, as I’m still feeling a little weepy and stupid, and I haven’t been out of my house in a month.  Her solution is “let’s go out and have fun, dammit!!!”  So we decide to leave Lou’s Village behind for the fun and excitement of The Saddle Rack, a massive county/western dance club/bar in San Jose which is only a few blocks away.  I’m not a huge Country fan, but this place is fun – it has got the works – 2 live bands, 4 dance floors, mechanical bull, you name it they got it.  It’s one of the biggest dance clubs in Northern California.

We go to the Rack and get some beers, settle on some bar stools and start to chat.  After a while we decide to walk around, stretch the legs and check out any hotties in attendance that evening (cowboy types in wranglers – yummy!!  I can live without the hubcap for a belt-buckle look, though).  We stop our walking and find a nice standing place when I glance over my shoulder and say to Heather, “Holy Shit!  Owen Nolan’s right behind you!”  Apparently, once the event at Lou’s Village broke up, many of the Sharks headed over to the Rack to continue “celebrating”.  We decide to just hold our ground and stand there for a while – not exactly following him around, but just “basking in the glow” as it were.  Heather has to go to the bathroom, but there’s no way in hell I’m going to go with her and lose my awesome vantage point, so I tell her to go ahead without me, I’ll just be right here.  So I’m standing in this huge bar just sort of “near” Owen and his friends when out of the blue one of Owen’s friends turns to me and says, “Don’t you agree?”  BINGO!!  I’m in.  Of course, I have NO IDEA what the hell the guy is talking about, but now I am legitimately in their conversation, and I start to milk it for all its worth.  I’m chatting with Owen and his two buddies Garnet and Jordan, who it turns out are chicken ranchers from Niagara Falls, and Darren Turcotte, who had just been traded to the San Jose Sharks a few days before.  Let me tell you, Darren Turcotte has the prettiest blue eyes I had ever seen, and I just began to drown in them.  All of a sudden I am convinced that this man is my ticket to a life of happiness as a hockey wife, and do I start to turn on the charm.  Poor guy.  I was so completely fucked up at that point I’m sure he had no idea what hit him, but I just didn’t care; I had him in my sights.  Heather comes back from the bathroom and finds me preying on this poor Shlub – I was leaning with my left elbow against a support beam with my left arm over my head, and my right hand on my hip, ass jutting out, trying to be sexy – must have looked ridiculous.  Truth be told – half of the reason I was standing that way wasn’t to be sexy, I was leaning against the support beam just in an effort to remain upright.  I was so trashed I’d been power drinking for several hours now – at least a bottle of champagne and four or five beers at the Rack.  God bless Darren, he was polite about my drunken awkward attempts at flirting.

Heather rescued Daren Turcotte and let him get away from me, and then I refocused my attention on Owen and the chicken ranchers.  Heather figured I was safe for a while and wandered off because she didn’t really care about Owen and was eyeing a cowboy of her own.  After a while Owen wandered off and now I’m just left to the chicken ranchers.  They were nice enough guys and we chatted for hours about shit I can’t even remember.  Around 2:00 am they were closing down the bar and the chicken ranchers tell me they need a ride home.  I said, well aren’t you going home with Owen, and they said Owen’s girlfriend had driven, and there was no room for them in the car.  I told them that I had not driven there that night, my friend Heather drove us, and I didn’t want to offer them a ride, because it was not my car.

So they asked me to ask Heather if she wouldn’t mind driving them back to Owen’s house.  Heather says, yes, she’ll give them a lift, but she drives a mini-truck, and there’s not enough room for 4 people.  One of the guys offers to lie down in the back of the truck to solve the problem.  We tell Owen that we’re going to give his friends a ride home and Owen gives us directions to his house, “Just take 280 south to Saratoga, its right there on Springer Avenue”.

So three of us jam into the cab of the truck – Heather drives, I’m in the middle and I have a chicken rancher crammed in to my right, who keeps trying to grab my ass – the other chicken rancher is lying down in the bed of the truck.  We get on 280 south and exit at Saratoga Avenue looking for Springer.  Owen has assured us that “Springer is right off 280” and we “can’t miss it” – of course I have no idea where Springer is, I’m not good with the geography of the town of Saratoga, Heather has no idea and the chicken ranchers are useless – one of them is freezing his ass off outside the truck, the other one is too busy trying to grab my ass to try to look at road signs.

Meanwhile Heather’s getting angry – we’re driving all over hell and back to give these guys a lift home and they don’t know where they’re going.  It really starting to get late at this point and I’m getting exhausted.  The ass grabbing continues.

We stop at a 24-hour supermarket and buy a map of Saratoga – we finally find Springer Avenue, and while it is right off Saratoga, it is NO WHERE NEAR highway 280.  Owen said 280 to Saratoga to Springer – he forgot to mention that it was well over 15 miles down Saratoga before you got to Springer!

Finally we find his house – a private condo complex in Saratoga (he has since then moved to a different gated community in San Jose).  It’s like 3:30 in the morning, and we’ve been looking for Owen’s house for the better part of an hour and a half.  When we get there, Owen is waiting in the garage for us to come in.  In the driveway is his girlfriend’s massive SUV.  Heather is furious.  The whole reason we drove these guys anywhere is because there was no room for them in Owen’s girlfriend’s car!  She takes one look at this, tells the chicken ranchers to get the hell out of her car and leaves tire marks peeling out of there.

My only regret is that we never did get to see the inside of Owen’s house.  I didn’t want to stay there or anything, but we could have told them we had to pee.  Oh well, live and learn.

Heather dropped me off at home around 3:45 am or so.

At 7:00 am that same morning, Heather and her mom showed up to pick me up for the San Jose Mercury News 5K/10K that we were all signed up for.  I have never felt like more shit in my life.  Working on about 3 hours of sleep, I was cranky and ill.  When they came to pick me up I was still sound asleep, Heather had to bang on my bedroom window to wake me up.  All I did was pull on a t-shirt and shorts and go – I don’t even think I put on clean underpants or brushed my hair.  I know I looked like shit, ‘cause I sure felt like it.  We took a light rail train downtown to the site of the race and I almost lost it several times on the journey.  As Heather and I stumbled our way through the 5/K walk, we tried to put together the pieces of the night before – so that we wouldn’t ever forget what a bizarre and funny night it was.  We were incapable of finishing the race without stopping at Der Wienerschitzel for corn dogs and hash browns.  Even thought we were among the first people to start the race, because we got downtown so freaking early, we were among the last to finish it.  We crossed the finish line with corn dogs in our hands and barely beating out a woman in a wheelchair.

(Picture below = Heather & me crossing the finish line with corndogs)

 

About a year later Heather and I had gone to the supermarket or something like that.  When I was unloading the stuff from the back of her truck, I burst out laughing.  Heather asked me what was so funny and I explained that I found a Canadian penny wedged in the grooves of the truck’s bed-liner.  It must have slipped out of the pocket of a chicken rancher.  She kept it there for a couple of years before it got swept out in a rainstorm.

The End.

I love this website.  Everyone can stand a little positive affirmation now and again.  I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!

SOMEONE PLEASE STOP ME BEFORE I HAIKU AGAIN!!!!

Besides being a fan of Haiku, I am also a big Harry Potter fan.  I post regularly on the SugarQuill forums, a website devoted to HP fan-fiction and debate.  Back on the day before book 6 was issued I started a thread at the Quill devoted to HP Haikus.  Here are some of my highlights…

(This was written on the night of the book 6 release)

Jul 15 2005, 17:55

I'm leaving work now

Going to release party

Might wet my pants soon

(These were written the morning after the release)

Jul 16 2005, 10:48

Weasley silbilings don't

Want Fleur for Sister-in-law

They all call her Phlegm

Harry and Ginny

Kiss on page five hundred and

Thirty-three. Hooray!

Tried Bertie Bott's Beans

Once ate a flavor called "worm"

Almost made me puke.

(Written later that same day…)

Jul 16 2005, 17:19

I am so tired

No sleep for Thirty-two hours

Worth it for canon

Hermione snogs

Krum, two years ago, so Ron

Snogs Lavender now

Draco no longer

Complete pretty-boy poseur

Now has Dark Lord's Mark

Jul 27 2005, 20:06

Luna Lovegood should

Have been Quidditch Announcer

Long Before Book Six

Zacharias Smith

Luna said he suffered from

Loser's Lurgy. Prat!

Jul 27 2005, 21:56

Tom thinks he's special

Long before Dumbledore comes

To explain Hogwarts

Aug 11 2005, 20:36

Happy birthday to

Ginny Weasley, hope you get

Several sunlit days

Aug 16 2005, 14:24

You can be a prat

Sometimes, but you are are also

Brave and true. Ron ROX!

Oct 10 2005, 18:15

Already tired

of the long wait. Is it time

For Book Seven yet?

People should read the whole thread for others’ Haikus.  Many of them are far more amusing than my humble contributions.

 I found this Haiku Meme while looking at a friend's LJ site. I've always been a sucker for a good Haiku -- but this Meme is fun because it generate Haikus from your most recent Blog entries, like so...

Cool eh?

I went to lunch yesterday with my dear friend music_mama (the one who nagged me mercilessly to open a LJ blog) at Bennigan’s in Santa Clara.  That place has the yummiest food ever -- the broccoli bites alone are to die for and don’t get me started on the baked potato soup.

It was nice for me to get away from the office for an hour and a half and hang out.  I don’t get to see MM that much because she and I live about 50 miles apart, so it was good to steal some time and catch up.  MM was taking a week off work, so she had the time to drive down to my neck of the woods with her sweet little boy whom I adore and share a leisurely lunch with me on a workday.

Lunch was nice, and we made each other laugh with stories, but I got the biggest laugh of the day from MM’s son.  MM’s son was sitting in a highchair/booster chair at the end of our booth and behaved very well throughout our meal.  MM ordered him a cheeseburger off the kids’ menu with cinnamon apples for a side dish (healthier than french fries).  MM decided to put the apples aside for the end of the meal to use for her son’s dessert.

When we finished eating our lunches, MM & I decided to split a desert (lava cake -- YUM!) and she gave her son the cinnamon apples for his desert.  The apples were prepared kind of like apple pie filling -- sliced in wedges and served in a warm sauce with raisins in it.  MM decided to take the apples out of the sauce to make it less sugary and so she scooped the apples out of the bowl they were served in and onto a clean bread plate.  She chopped the apple slices into smaller slices and gave the plate to her son with a spoon.  He decided he didn’t really want to use a spoon, and the apples made fine finger food.  Despite the fact that MM had taken the apples and raisins out of most of the sauce they were served in, they were still pretty sticky.

MM and I were engrossed in lava cake and conversation, and her son was quietly eating his apples next to us.  The next thing I know MM exclaims, “oh my god -- can you grab an arm?”  I looked over, and MM’s son was unsuccessfully trying to wipe the apple goop off his hands by rubbing his hands together.  He’d succeeded in rubbing the goo all over both hands and covered his arms all the way past his elbows and almost under his shirt sleeves.  He looked like an oiled-up pro wrestler, his arms were so shiny.

I started to crack up and grabbed an arm to stop him from rubbing the stuff on to his clothes and started getting the glop off.  It took me 2 wet-ones and 2 napkins till his left hand and arm weren't sticky anymore.

I laughed over that one for 20 minutes straight while MM and I finished our lava cake and then took her son to the ladies’ room to properly wash his hands before I had to go back to work and they had to go home.

That was an entertaining lunch for sure.  Good food, good friends, good laugh.

Go Here: Non Sequitur - 08/28/2006

Techno-wuss alert: I'm not good at video games like Playstation or XBOX or anything like that.  I find that the controllers are too confusing; there are too many buttons to deal with, etc.  I am the proud owner of an Atari 2600 that my brother and I got for Christmas of 1982 that still works.  Give me a joystick with a single fire button any day of the week.  I’ve got about 40 different game cartridges for the Atari, most of them I got by scouring Goodwill stores when I was in college, picking up 4 or 5 game cartridges for a dollar.  I have it hooked up to a crappy 9-inch TV that I used in my college dorm room, circa 1989, and I occasionally bust it out and play a rousing game of Q*Bert, Frogger, Super Breakout or Pitfall.

I also love to play cheap solitaire games on the computer.  I found a website that has free downloads of the Best of Windows Entertainment Pack games.  Go to http://therhogue.com/tripeaks.htm and scroll to the bottom of the page until you get to the instructions "Click below to download BOWEP" and also "Click below to download more free games" -- once you download from those links you will wind up with over 30 free Windows games that are fun for the whole family.

Taipei -- I love this game -- the tiles are based on Mah-Jongg (not that I have any idea how to play Mah-Jongg) but it’s basically a puzzle game.  The best thing about Taipei is the once you clear all the tiles, you get the "winner's fortune" which is like some kind of Confucius "Ancient Chinese Secret" type thing.  Here are the Taipei winner’s fortunes (in alphabetical order):

1) A helping hand brings you closer to a secret goal.

2) A joyful reunion awaits your arrival.

3) A new friendship will help cast a spell of enchantment.

4) A secret goal is in sight -- hang in there.

5) A visit with friends will prove an enjoyable occasion.

6) All the little things will add to a happy journey.

7) An unexpected gift will add to your pleasure.

8) Another's expression of appreciation will delight you.

9) Be patient, and the answer will be revealed.

10) Concern for a friend's happiness will enhance your own.

11) Congratulations on winning Taipei!

12) Have you found the ancient Taipei secret?

13) Know yourself so that you might understand others.

14) Listen to your heart and proceed with confidence.

15) Memorable moments will make your trip delightful.

16) New experiences and new friends will enrich your life.

17) Stay calm, cool, and collected, and all things will fall into place.

18) Strange new experiences will add to your joy of living.

19) That fleeting thought is worth pursuing.

20) The concern of others will make your trip a delight.

21) Through the eyes of love all things will take on a new meaning.

22) Travel with a light heart and happy expectations.

23) Unexpected offer deserves serious consideration.

24) Unseen forces are working in your favor.

25) Unusual offer will enhance your future.

26) Welcome the chance to learn about others.

27) What you do with sincerity pays the greatest reward.

28) Whatever you do, make it fun.

29) Wherever you go, there you are.

30) Why not try another fine Windows game?

31) Within you lies the power for good -- use it.

32) You will attend a party where strange customs prevail.

33) You will be showered by attention.

34) You will relax in the lap of luxury.

35) Your trust in a friend will prove well-founded.

And last but not least, my very very favorite Taipei fortune evah…..:

36) Bouncy ball is the source of all goodness and light

Bouncy ball?  WTF is that?  That is so completely out of left field that it's totally awesome.  Every time I get this fortune, I light up with an inner glow of contentment.  Also, it is the only one of the fortunes that is devoid of any kind of punctuation.  Make of that what you will.  And why are there 36 fortunes?  That seems like a pretty random number.  And yes – I did play hundreds of games of Taipei over the past three days just so that I could write down all of the different fortunes.  I’m pretty sure I got them all.  And yes, I am that much of a dork.

Ski Free is a great game from the BOWEP set as well -- but because the only instructions are "Use numpad (0-9) for better control; F2= restart; F3=pause" it took me forever to learn how to get decent points on the dang thing -- you have to do flips & tricks to make up for the points you lose for slamming into trees, other skiers and dogs.  And the best way to do flips is to mouse-click really fast once you're flying off a jump.  Which is hard to do if you’re using the "numpad" like the "instructions" tell you to do.  My scores were always in the negative numbers, but now that I figured out how to do the flips and things, my high score is 586.  Which I'm sure to some people is pathetic, but I think it's just swell.  I love how if you smash into a dead tree it bursts into flames, the dogs bark at you as you pass them, every time you smack a tree or a dog or another skier you say "ouch!", and then at the end you get eaten by a yeti.  It's a totally dumb game with crappy graphics, but I just think it's funny.

My favorite of the free games are probably Columns, which is a crappy version of Tetris, Stones which is a puzzle game, and Word Zap which is a spelling game.  If you do well in Word Zap, you get promoted to "word hero" and "word ace," which are nice titles to add to my resume.  I’ll take positive reinforcement anywhere I can get it.